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Social media and technology has made this ridiculous. It used to be that all you had to deal with was the relatives saying stand up straight.
Now Bloglovin' and Pinterest are crammed with charts on a better you that say #1 Get up earlier! #2 Work smarter! #3 Work faster!
And of course in the off time you are supposed to practice mindfulness and Self Care.
There are apps to make sure you drink enough water and get enough sleep.
Well listen.
Here's what I think.
If you are overwhelmed.
Two things to do:
First.
Recognize the beauty of boundaries. Women need to do this.
The way I see it what we owe other people most is this:
- Listen
- Recognize that if someone is cranky there are probably other things going on you don't know about. Give them that benefit of the doubt
- Take care of as much of your own shit as you can
- If you need something ask clearly and be OK with the response (women in particular waste lives hoping people notice and will provide, mostly they just need clear asks)
- Listen
Second
Note not on this list is fixing everything, or worrying yourself sick for their sake. I remember always the advice a woman in a playground gave me about children years ago.
Don't do for them what they can do for themselves.
The flip side of this of course is that when someone can't do for themselves you can then be fully available.
If you want to eat better:
Do more of your own cooking.
The main reason people don't eat well is time.
Figure out what you can make fast yourself and you will eat better. Avocado or tomatoes on toast is just fine if that's what you want. Make yourself a soup with vegetables in it and make salads with leftover cooked vegetables. Have this in the fridge.
By the time you figure out how to negotiate that new diet plan there will be something else on the agenda. (Note everything on Facebook is "backed by science". Also note there is more than one scientist).
If you want to exercise more:
If exercise is a should not a want for you, here's what I think.
Again two things.
One.
Go outside more. Most people when they are outside don't just stand there. We are not counting lying at the beach.
If you are outside you will walk, pull weeds, shovel snow, talk to the neighbours.
Two:
Do more around the house.
This is my observation.
All those fit old ladies are really busy. You see them mowing their own lawns. Spring cleaning. They hustle and they bustle. From the minute they get up until the minute they go to bed.
A distant relative by marriage just died.
She was one of those tiny busy old Greek ladies, she cooked, cleaned, gardened full time nearly to the end of her life.
She died a few weeks ago at 105.
Without paying any attention to her breathe or her core.
Finally, since I appear to be kicking off 2019 in a know it all mood.
See the funny side in everything. Particularly yourself.
Believe me it's there.
Happy New Year
