A person has to do a little time wasting to break the momentum, and in case you are behind in the time wasting department I will share mine with you.
Quite some time ago one of my fabulous step-daughers sort of squinted at me and said "you know they have great make-up videos on YouTube."
What you mean the mid 1990's where not the all time pinnacle of glamourizing technique?
Now you tell me.
So that remembered comment, and the fact the man I married actually said these words to me got me going:
"You know you look like Keith Richards".
I didn't make this up.
He actually said that. He now claims that he was referring only to the large, made-by-me headband I wear to keep my hair up when I am in the bath.
The headband reminded him.
But really.
What would you do to your man if he thought you reminded him of this:
I mean if that isn't a comparison to send a woman off to either dialling 1-800-get-adivorcefast or onto YouTube for make-up advice I don't know what is.
So here ladies is what I got.
All you have to do is a search for "make-up for old eyes."
A fabulous video with a great guy who actually puts on his "mature eye make-up" on one of his very own eyes as he speaks. (Just ignore the part where he defines "mature" as anyone over 30, I did and I am sure Keith did too, and BTW old Keith could do with a good look at this video himself).
Enjoy.
I'm assuming your husband is not a member of any diplomatic corp.
ReplyDeleteMy cat and I watched the guy with the makeup demo. We both thought he did a great job if you are preparing for an evening out but it was a bit much for everyday.
We think a dark line drawn all the way around the eye makes the eye look tiny and hard -- not an attractive look, and very dated, IMO. My mother said it looks like two burnt holes in a blanket. He avoided that all-too-common look.
Eyebrows make a huge difference in one's appearance. Getting them shaped, and visiting a makeup counter (Bobbi Brown is good) for a complimentary makeup may set you on a good path.
It may be difficult to find inexpensive shadows & cheek colors that don't have glitter in them; Bobbi Brown has a nice selection of matte products.
A dear, well-loved face brings joy to those around her, whether or not she's made up.
Oh my word!! What a comment!! But what a chuckle you gave me! Now I'll be heading off to Youtube to check this out, the bags under my eyes are getting seriously large enough to be almost useful!
ReplyDeleteI don't wear makeup, so don't ask me. But dontcha just wonder how someone who looks like an ugly old POS can make such great music?
ReplyDeleteLOLOLOLOL!!! Aaah, you are TOO
ReplyDeleteadorable and fun. That husband
must stand in the corner for at
least 30 mins., pondering the utter
blasphemous error of his ways ..no?
hahaha.
The makeup guru: encouraging,
to know I'm twice over the age
of his 'older.' ;) Hah! The laborious, multi-
brush and color eye techniques made
a difference (IF I were so equipped
and lasted to the end before my eyes
started tearing.)
I really enjoy your blog .. you're a very talented,
engaging writer.
~Joy~ (from SG)
Fantastic! My husband actually came in from the other room and asked why I was watching a gay Englishman make up his eyes. When I told him your comments, he looked very alarmed for your husband!
ReplyDeleteThanks for my laugh of the day!
Just the chuckle I needed this week, Barb. My gardening bandana has earned me a Willie Nelson comparison.
ReplyDeleteDonna
What?! No glueing of little sequins along your upper eye to make a shimmering eyeliner that matches your disco outfit? No bright blue mascara? I am shocked.
ReplyDeleteI think he needs to make Valentine's Day extra special. Maybe he needs to wear some make-up himself? or a headband? Elle
ReplyDeleteOver 30 mature! Let' all dig a hole and die, lol!
ReplyDeleteAs for the Keith Richards comments, I am sure it was all about the head band.
Maybe your husband meant the YOUNG Keith Richards. He was quite striking in his younger days (you know, BEFORE he was 30). I am a HUUUUUGE fan of Keith and will never say anything bad about him, but that man could use some eye cream, for real.
ReplyDeleteGravity sucks.
Hmmmph! What time in the morning would you get up to do all that? And he just did one eye! His left eye looked wonderful but he needs to stop biting his nails and he could use a visit to Daniel Daniel Dentistry. Your husband said that because he knew you wouldn't be able to get out of the bath fast enough to wallop him.
ReplyDeleteI'll watch the video now...couldn't when I read your post...I was laughing too hard! You made my day!!!
ReplyDeleteI hope you are now sniffing contentedly at at least a dozen red roses :) That was by far the funniest comment I've heard this year, more so because it's one my own dear husband might so easily make. Except he'd compare me to Alfred Hitchcock or Churchill, minus the bald heads and pot bellies (yes, I'm dating myself).
ReplyDeleteI've watched several of Wayne's videos and he's great (and not gay), but I don't have time for all that work every day either. Do the brows, lighten the lids with a touch of concealer and use lots of mascara. If it's good enough for French women, it's good enough for me. You're a great writer and an inspiring seamstress. Thanks again for the laugh-out-loud post.
moushka
Clicking my way thru sewing blogs, I've come across your blog and I cannot tell you how much I enjoy it. I am laughing so hard, I'm crying...Keith Richards..I can't even say it without bursting out laughing again. You are an absolute riot and I will forever be a faithful reader. I love the way you view life and of course, the fact that you possess the ability to see the humor of it all!
ReplyDelete