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Sunday, August 30, 2020

Flypaper thoughts fallow year edition

  • I am settling into the long termness of our situation
  • I'm facing facts this week
  • It could be a year until I see my son, my DIL, and grandchild in California
  • A year is a long time in a child's life
  • And I have always been able to get to one of my children if I have to
  • This is the way it has to be
  • My 92-year-old mother says she wonders if she will be in isolation the rest of her life
  • Right now I would have to quarantine for two weeks if I flew to see her in Winnipeg
  • And two weeks back
  • I would do it but no one thinks I should fly
  • My lovely mother-in-law has decided she won't see us
  • "until all this is over"
  • Despite next to no covid here
  • But since my husband works and I see the kids
  • She doesn't want to risk it
  • She won't even go for outside visits with masks
  • What can we do?
  • My youngest son's girlfriend in Texas has broken it off
  • She couldn't stand the waiting
  • He is building a friend's house and surfing
  • But not talking much
  • He was counting on this
  • My niece and her boyfriend (my SIL's nephew)
  • Have moved into our basement while they are house hunting
  • She is a nurse and if we have a second wave
  • Plan is she will move into the RV to be safe
  • So that's the situation
  • I am sure you have yours
  • But I have been thinking
  • About fallow years
  • When I was in middle school in the middle ages
  • We used to sit at our desks and the teacher did a short bible reading after lunch
  • How long ago was that?
  • I am remembering the part about the fallow years
  • To keep producing every seven years the land was not worked and people lived off the good years
  • As I remember it was not a good idea to break this pattern
  • Pretty much horrible things happened if you tried to opt out
  • I have been thinking about rest too and how hard it is for us to just sit
  • We got into this pattern
  • So busy, more and more
  • Don't stop
  • I thought of this when I saw women risking their lives for manicures in those states that opened too early
  • I talked this week to a young woman who as far as I could see
  • Was in a frenzy fed by social media competition
  • Thinking of my own life 
  • Worked so hard at my job and then retired and went deep into a book
  • Every day for the last eight months I worked on it
  • Worried myself because it meant I was not posting here
  • People contacted me and said get back to blogging
  • I see favourite bloggers post garment after garment
  • And me I make things and give them to people and forget to take the picture
  • One more thing
  • I drove yesterday past streets named for boys who didn't come home from the war
  • I thought of those mothers who waited
  • And at best only got letters
  • Sometimes
  • I want to ask them what did you do, how did you do it?
  • Airmen from Australia farm boys from the Canadian prairies
  • It makes me think how foolish we are
  • And it has made me think of our exhausted selves and exhausted lives
  • And all that documenting, busyness, continuous self improvement
  • Like all those over 50 style posts
  • Thin women with big bags and and white shirts
  • None of them in an apron
  • Made me wonder about the lesson of fallow years
  • And letting things sit to revive
  • Why is this the last option we want to consider?
  • It seems to me that right now the bravest thing to do 
  • Would be to just sit
  • And have faith
  • Today I am canning tomatoes
  • To taste this summer during my quiet winter
  • You?